I’m afraid that I’ve grown up. I get home, and instead of taking a refreshing nap, watching highlights on SportsCenter, or a re-run of Family Guy, I watch MSNBC, CNN, or if I’m feeling particularly worn-out, Fox News. Even though one of my good friends has worked for George Stephanopoulos’s Sunday talk show, This Week for over a year, I watched it for the first time yesterday – and couldn’t muster the strength to change it to the latest hotel room romantic comedy drivel.
As I was getting a haircut over the weekend, my barber told me, “You know you’re getting old when you go out of your way to watch CNN.” It’s true. Much of my youth was dedicated to trying to figure out why my Grandma enjoys watching Larry King. My sister started watching it when she turned thirty, so I think I’m at least a few years away from that entertainmentless black hole.
The point is, I think my head is going to explode if I don’t vote immediately, and I hope you feel the same way. Moreover, I fear that I am becoming a crabby old man, or the illegitimate love child result of an orgy between Sean Hannity, Keith Olbermann, Greta van Susteren, Bill O’Reilly, Rachel Maddow and Chris Rock. Between the Redskins playing tonight and the election tomorrow, if things don’t work out favorably, I think I have a 76% of having an aneurysm. Compound that with the predictive power of the Redskins’ last game before the election and I’m in trouble.
